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Just because!
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Let's see if I get banned for this one! :D



A bus stops, and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:


"Emma comefirst. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."


"You foul-mouthed, sex-obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country.... we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives."


"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abou ta sex? I'm a just a tellin' my frienda how to spell Mississippi'."



I BET YOU READ THIS AGAIN!!!
 

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God said that he was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He told him, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she'll wash it for you. She will always agree with every
decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never
have a headache, and will freely give you love and passion whenever you want it.

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"

God replied, "A woman that special will cost an arm and a leg."

Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

The rest is history.:ha:
 

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boblamb58 said:
God said that he was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He told him, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she'll wash it for you. She will always agree with every
decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never
have a headache, and will freely give you love and passion whenever you want it.

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"

God replied, "A woman that special will cost an arm and a leg."

Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

The rest is history.:ha:
TOO True...(ouch, says TJ as his wife smacks him upside the head...)
 

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<-----No More Beetle :(
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18,312 Posts
boblamb58 said:
God said that he was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman. He told him, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she'll wash it for you. She will always agree with every
decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never
have a headache, and will freely give you love and passion whenever you want it.

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"

God replied, "A woman that special will cost an arm and a leg."

Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

The rest is history.:ha:

:eek13:

:lol:
 

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USS ANNIEPRISE NCC 1701 A
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4,142 Posts
Ok I have one. A lady calls 911 to get a firetruck to come to her house. The man says, :Whats your adress?. She says P.O. Box 7587. The man, after already having a long, tiring day says "Lady I am coming in a truck, not and envelope"
 

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2015 Acura TLX
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5,429 Posts
jdesigns said:
Let's see if I get banned for this one! :D



A bus stops, and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:


"Emma comefirst. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."


"You foul-mouthed, sex-obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country.... we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives."


"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abou ta sex? I'm a just a tellin' my frienda how to spell Mississippi'."



I BET YOU READ THIS AGAIN!!!
Just reading through the old threads again. This is fun stuff for a foggy Saturday morning and a fresh cuppa joe...
 
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